I screw up.
I think ym would be so disappointed in me despite talking to me for the whole yesterday.

This could probably the end.
All I could say is, if he wants to walk out on me, I can't stop him. I can't force him to be with me, I can't force someone to love me back.

But if this was given a second chance, I want a fresh new start between us. I'll promise you that I will not live in your past anymore, for real. However, I need you to stop lying to me too. Actions on both parts. I really wish you could see and think the way I do, then you would understand why I done what I've done. But I wish too, that I could see and think the way you do, then I would understand why you did it.

But somehow, I have a really bad feeling that this is really the end. Because he never takes this long to think about us if it wasn't a bad news.

Mum heard me yelling on the phone, after i hung up, she came into the room and hugged her emotionally drained out lil daughter that was crying hysterically.

My mum asked me whether do I really love him a lot.
And I said I do, if not...why would I have done what I've done?

And she said..other people that are in love are happy, but why are you so sad when you're in love?

I can't stop crying. I'm not looking forward to my birthday anymore. I don't feel like celebrating anymore. What's there to celebrate when the person I love the most isn't there for me anymore?

Sigh.
I've lived the moments. I love you.